Ficlet: With The Fishes

[bk_forever]

Title: With The Fishes

Author: badly_knitted

Characters: Ianto, Jack

Rating: G

Spoilers: Nada.

Summary: It was an accident, but Ianto’s not in a very forgiving mood.

Word Count: 507

Written For: My own prompt ‘Any, any, Accidentally driving into a body of water,’ at fic_promptly.

Disclaimer: I don’t own Torchwood, or the characters. They belong to the BBC.

“I said ‘brake’ not ‘shove your foot down on the accelerator as hard as you can’!”

Jack risked a glance at Ianto, who was looking as angry as he sounded. Which, under current circumstances, was understandable. Not that it had been intentional on Jack’s part.

“Oops? Look, Ianto, I’m sorry. It’s not as if I meant for this to happen. I didn’t suddenly think, ‘Oh, it’s a lovely day, let’s go for a swim.’ Although, now I think about it, it really is a lovely day and…” He trailed off when he caught the expression on Ianto’s face where he sat beside Jack in the front seat of the SUV, up to his chest in water. It was probably a good thing that the recent heat wave meant the river was shallow for once. “My foot slipped, okay? I must have missed some of the slime when I was cleaning it off, got some on the foot pedals. Look on the bright side, at least we’re not in danger of drowning.”

Ianto didn’t reply, just unclipped his seat belt and opened the passenger side door.

“Wait! Where are you going?”

That got Ianto’s attention and earned Jack a withering glare. “To dry land of course. Feel free to stay here in the middle of the river if you want, but I prefer to be somewhere that doesn’t mean I have fish swimming around me.”

“Ooh, what kind?” Jack looked down at the water sloshing around him. “Maybe we can catch something for dinner!”

“I don’t know what kind, Jack! I’m not an ichthyologist! Anyway, I don’t care, we’re not catching anything, we don’t have a fishing licence and I wouldn’t eat anything caught here anyway.” Ianto floundered his way out of the car and waded ashore, pulling out his phone and shaking it disconsolately. Naturally it was full of water, having been in his trouser pocket.

Jack made a mental note to ask Tosh about the possibility of waterproofing the team’s phones. It might be a good idea. With a sigh, he turned off the SUV’s engine, which had already stopped due to being flooded, and climbed out, locking the vehicle, just in case anyone should try to steal it. Not that it seemed very likely, but you could never be sure. The fish might try to make off with it for all he knew.

“What do we do now?” Jack asked once he’d joined Ianto on the riverbank.

“We passed a village a few miles back. Even if they don’t have a garage we should still be able to phone for a tow truck.” Ianto set off back along the road and Jack fell into step beside him.

“At least it’s a nice day for a walk. We should dry out pretty quickly.” There was already steam rising from both of them in the warm sunshine.

“Humpf.”

Jack winced; he really was in the doghouse, no doubt he’d be drinking decaf for the foreseeable future. Looked like it was going to be a very long walk.

The End

Comments

[but_can_i_be_trusted]

Ohhh, boy; Ianto in a snit! I don't think I'd want to be on the wrong end of him, lol!

[bk_forever]

Does Ianto have a wrong end? I rather like both ends. The top end is pretty and the bottom end is very nicely shaped ;)

Yes, Ianto in a snit is a fearful sight, Jack had better tread carefully to avoid worsening his punishment...

Thank you!

[but_can_i_be_trusted]

I tend to not look at bottom ends, myself, so I wouldn't know; the upper end is quite nice, though. :)

Haha, I get the feeling he probably will end up making things worse for himself. Trouble and men named Jack, in general (there really seems to be a trend, in fiction/folklore/history), seem to go hand-in-hand!

[bk_forever]

That's true, I can think of several Jacks that tend to be trouble magnets...

I've seen photos of GDL from behind, and he definitely has a very nice rear, trust me on this. JB's is also very nice - Rear of the Year awards to prove it!

My email keeps logging me out for no reason so I'm giving up and heading to bed in an effort to have an earlier night. Been a bit under the weather the last few days and I was hoping to get to town at the weekend for the craft fair and owls, so I need to give myself a little tlc. Catch up with you tomorrow, sdweet dreams!

[spikesgirl58.livejournal.com]

Whoops, I see some major fence mending in store for Mr. Jack. Still, Ianto will probably cool down enough eventually to realize it had been just a mistake. Mistakes do happen.

[bk_forever]

If Jack hadn't been driving with his usual reckless abandon in the first place, it might not have been so bad. If Jack grovels a bit, promises to get the SUV professionally cleaned, and buys Ianto new shoes to replace the pair that I'm sure are now ruined, I think he'll be forgiven. Ianto just wants to be grumpy for a while because his clothes are all soggy and his shoes squish with very step.

Thank you!

[spikesgirl58.livejournal.com]

I know the feeling. There are times when you just don't want to ruin a good head of being pissed off.

[bk_forever]

Plus it will give him energy for the long walk ahead.

Thank you!

[owensheart.livejournal.com]

Ooh Jacks in Biiiiiig trouble.

[bk_forever]

He should be used to that by now!

Thank you!

[m-findlow.livejournal.com]

It was an accident after all. I'm sure Ianto will be more forgiving once he's warm and dry.

[bk_forever]

I'm sure drying out will improve his mood. Dripping clothes and squishing shoes are annoying so while that last he'll keep grumbling, but by the time the reach civilisation he'll probably be starting to cheer up.

Thank you!

[raynewton.livejournal.com]

Ianto will enjoy his snit for a while, But once he's dried out and cooled off he'll be very receptive to Jack's many inventive and grovelling apologies and reparations - which they will both enjoy. Ianto doesn't have a mean bone in his body and knows it was an accident. And yes, both men have delicious top - and bottom ends. I know having drooled over them in a manner ill befitting my advanced years - but i's such fun to do so.

[bk_forever]

I'm old enough to be GDL's mum, but that doesn't stop me either, lol!

Yes, Ianto will let his bad mood fuel him for the long walk ahead, but he'll let Jack apologise in suitable ways later ;)

Thank you!

[black59.livejournal.com]

hahaha
Poor Ianto sometimes quiet strength is not enough to manage Jack.
fortunately the décaféinié lets off steam !!!
big hug to Ianto

[bk_forever]

Ianto will feel better when he dries out, but Jack will still be getting decaf, because they'll have to get the SUV cleaned and serviced!

Thank you!