Ok, is the other one good? It sounded like fun if I remember correctly. I will have to go back and read your post again. Things are really tough again and I've had an awful start to my day. My memory is shot.
I just paid several bills and I am trying to get an appointment with a new Psychiatrist. Dr. Marshall is an old guy, very good doctor, but his health is not good, and he is out on medical leave. He had surgery, I just found out today. I will run out of my regular meds if I don't see someone else until he comes back.
Nancy changed my pain medication to hydrocodine, not as strong a pain killer, but thought it might not give me the rash/hives?...well I took the first one last night and woke up in the worst shape yet. I not only was breaking out with these hot, now "all" raised welts, I was so nausous, and trying to hide it from Alex, but I think that only made things worse, I'm sure Alex saw the pain in my face even when I tried to smile. :( I didn't really realize which med caused it so I took one of the stupid hydrocodones today. Stupid! I guess I will be sick all day. Michael says it makes his mother sick too, so tonight I will go back to the other one "Percocet aka Oxycodone" I've used both words just to confuse you in the past. lol! I can remember how to spell Percocet better so I used it. They are basically the same drug. Benedryl seems to be of no use anymore, I keep increasing it, but it doesn't help that I can see. I've about run out again. Need to buy another box or two because somehow it makes me less scared. Weird huh? I thought it might keep my lips or eyes from swelling up again like they did on the way to the beach. GEEZ! Just stick me back in the mental hospital and leave me there! Just kidding.
I really think I understand now why you got off those terrible drugs a long time ago. I wish I could. I guess I am just going to have to live through this and hopefully we will find the answers.
Nancy gave me these steroid pills to stop the allergic reaction, but so far it hasn't helped. Of course I only started them last night. I take them for six days so I will have to be patient. Michael doesn't think they cause nausea, just water weight gain (oh yay!) NOT!...but that will go away after I stop taking them.
I still wonder if it isn't the antidepressant, but I won't know without stopping it, and I don't know what to do. Michael says no, I was in worse shape mentally off of them, but I can't take this constant itching. I don't sleep well or wake up too early like today and as soon as I think about them, there they are. Maybe I am doing it to myself worrying so much, though Michael says no. I hope he is right. I am on so much crap I want to scream! I wish I could just stop taking all of it, but I know I can't. I felt like dying again this morning, but I am in too good of health otherwise to be "that Lucky!" LOL! If I survive this, I will either be stronger or dead!...that didn't make sense?
Sorry to spout all this out on your LJ. Should have wrote it on a new post. I guess I just like talking just to you sometimes. You're my friend, my special friend and I know you understand this kind of pain. :)
Oh I was crying in Michael's arms this morning too, forgot to tell you, just edited this post. Like you wanted to know that part too.
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Date: 2012-06-12 07:48 pm (UTC)I just paid several bills and I am trying to get an appointment with a new Psychiatrist. Dr. Marshall is an old guy, very good doctor, but his health is not good, and he is out on medical leave. He had surgery, I just found out today. I will run out of my regular meds if I don't see someone else until he comes back.
Nancy changed my pain medication to hydrocodine, not as strong a pain killer, but thought it might not give me the rash/hives?...well I took the first one last night and woke up in the worst shape yet. I not only was breaking out with these hot, now "all" raised welts, I was so nausous, and trying to hide it from Alex, but I think that only made things worse, I'm sure Alex saw the pain in my face even when I tried to smile. :( I didn't really realize which med caused it so I took one of the stupid hydrocodones today. Stupid! I guess I will be sick all day. Michael says it makes his mother sick too, so tonight I will go back to the other one "Percocet aka Oxycodone" I've used both words just to confuse you in the past. lol! I can remember how to spell Percocet better so I used it. They are basically the same drug. Benedryl seems to be of no use anymore, I keep increasing it, but it doesn't help that I can see. I've about run out again. Need to buy another box or two because somehow it makes me less scared. Weird huh? I thought it might keep my lips or eyes from swelling up again like they did on the way to the beach. GEEZ! Just stick me back in the mental hospital and leave me there! Just kidding.
I really think I understand now why you got off those terrible drugs a long time ago. I wish I could. I guess I am just going to have to live through this and hopefully we will find the answers.
Nancy gave me these steroid pills to stop the allergic reaction, but so far it hasn't helped. Of course I only started them last night. I take them for six days so I will have to be patient. Michael doesn't think they cause nausea, just water weight gain (oh yay!) NOT!...but that will go away after I stop taking them.
I still wonder if it isn't the antidepressant, but I won't know without stopping it, and I don't know what to do. Michael says no, I was in worse shape mentally off of them, but I can't take this constant itching. I don't sleep well or wake up too early like today and as soon as I think about them, there they are. Maybe I am doing it to myself worrying so much, though Michael says no. I hope he is right. I am on so much crap I want to scream! I wish I could just stop taking all of it, but I know I can't. I felt like dying again this morning, but I am in too good of health otherwise to be "that Lucky!" LOL! If I survive this, I will either be stronger or dead!...that didn't make sense?
Sorry to spout all this out on your LJ. Should have wrote it on a new post. I guess I just like talking just to you sometimes. You're my friend, my special friend and I know you understand this kind of pain. :)
Oh I was crying in Michael's arms this morning too, forgot to tell you, just edited this post. Like you wanted to know that part too.
Thanks! Delete me if you want to. LOL!
love Deb* aka mental patient*